Valentine's Day is the first song in the episode My Furry Valentine.
Big Mouth My Furry Valentine Sing-Along Netflix
Lyrics[]
DIANE
It's a day of hugs and snuggles
ELLIOT
A time to spread your loving seeds
NICK
It's a rolling, growing pink snowball
Of stress that no one needs
ANDREW
It's unhealthy expectations
DEVON
An opportunity to impress
JESSI
It's a yearly grim reminder
That your life's a fucked-up mess
MISSY
It's a dark and lurid history
Of deviant Pagan kicks
MARTY
It's outrageously expensive
Just stay home and watch the Knicks
MATTHEW
It's a big fat middle finger
To those who are all alone
JAY
Whether sick or tired or uninspired
You still gotta bring the bone
JESSI/CONNIE
It's a clusterfuck of passions
An emotional tour de force
MATTHEW/MAURY
It's a cuddly little Cupid
MAURY
With the cock of a full-grown horse
ALL
Valentine, St. Valentine
I gotta make it through your day
Of candy hearts and chocolate sharts
and every bullshit love cliché
The hard-ons and the heartaches
The pressure, pain, and fear
Valentine's Day
Got to survive you another year
NICK (ANDREW)
What does having a girl hormone monster mean? (I can't take it, all the pressure)
JAY (ANDREW)
How long can I be a fuck machine? (I can make it, i'll impress her)
ANDREW (MATTHEW)
I'll be cool, and she'll be drooling (Why is there never anyone for me?)
ANDREW/MARTY
But then what if the Knicks aren't on TV?
ALL
Valentine, St. Valentine
Your day is fuckin' asinine
But I swear by God
I'm gonna make it through!