|“||Wait, we've never had a female president? I thought for sure we had a woman president. I can totally picture a lady's hand on the bible. Oh, you know what it is? I'm thinking of House of Cards.||”|
—Greg Glaser in The ASSes
Greg Glaser is a supporting character of Big Mouth. He is the stoned father of Jessi Glaser and the ex-husband of Shannon Glaser. He first appeared in "Sleepover: A Harrowing Ordeal of Emotional Brutality". He is voiced by Seth Morris.
As seen in "Drug Buddies", Greg and Shannon were boyfriend and girlfriend since at least 1998, where they watched The Truman Show and smoked weed together, while listening to music from Phish and Rusted Root.
Marriage & Parenthood
Greg and Shannon got married and on April 16th, 2004, had a daughter named Jessi Glaser. As a family, the trio lived in a suburban household in Westchester, New York. Greg was a good husband to Shannon and a good father to Jessi, who he became really good friends with. Even as a father, Greg was still a weed-smoker but he made sure to keep that stuff out of reach from his daughter.
Greg Glaser is a good father to his daughter Jessi. He and Shannon eventually went their separate ways. They were together for 20 years but as time went on, Greg became less responsible and lazy. He became a pothead and had trouble holding down a job. This led to Shannon and Greg having many major falling outs during their marriage, which Jessi was sadly on the back-burner for most of.
Shannon got tired of putting up with his laziness and ended up getting a divorce. In "I Survived Jessi's Bat Mitzvah", Greg overheard Shannon break the news to Jessi that she was divorcing Greg, before she even announced it to Greg and this really cut deep for him. The only way Greg knew how to dull the pain was to get majorly stoned. Although it sucked that Shannon had dumped him, Greg's primary concern was not for himself, but for the well-being of his daughter.
After their divorce, Greg still lived in the same house as his ex, just in the basement, which he was in seldom allowed to leave. In "Steve the Virgin", Greg had a heart-to-heart with Jessi, saying that he still loves Shannon and admits that he blew it and took her for granted.
In "Drug Buddies", Jessi got into Greg's edible gummibears in the basement and took them with her friend, Nick. When Jessi came come high, Shannon was quick to figure out what happened and Greg was quick to find out that Jessi took his gummibears. Shannon was so pissed at Greg for getting her daughter high that she officially kicked him out of the house right then and there. Jessi begged her mom to let him stay and blamed herself for getting high but Greg refused to let his daughter take the sacrifice and left the house, which brought Jessi to tears.
In "Guy Town", Greg's friends, Elliot and Marty took him to Guy Bilzerian's apartment complex, Guy Town, a men's apartment complex for divorcees, which turned out to be a very shitty, run-down dumpster fire. Greg thought that this apartment was good enough for him but as for his daughter, it was unfit. He didn't want his daughter to come to a gross, sleazy, run-down, shithole full of gross misogynistic bums every time she wanted to visit him, so he forced Guy to cut his lease and let him leave.
With nowhere to live, Coach Steve kindly allowed Greg to live with him in the dirty diaper-filled intermodal container at Deep Queens Self Storage until he got back up on his feet and found a real apartment. At the end of his rope, Greg had no choice but to accept.
In "The ASSes", Greg got a job as a grocery bagger at Trader Joe's. However, since there was already a guy who was named "Greg" there, his nametag read "Grag" and he was referred to as such by his boss and co-workers. At this time, Jessi was taking The Academic Skill Surveys at school and was having a panic attack, worried she was going to fail. Greg gave her some words of encouragement and made her feel more confident about passing the ASSes.
In "Super Mouth", Greg finally got his own apartment in New York City and moved out of Coach Steve's diaper barge. Greg gave Jessi the grand tour of his new apartment, hoping it was suitable for her. Jessi liked the apartment but was not happy to hear that Greg had already gotten a girlfriend. Apparently, Greg was dating a girl named Kaitlyn, who worked with him at Trader Joe's. Jessi was not on board with her dad having a new girlfriend, very worried about how things might turn out but she knew that Greg was happy with her, so she just had to let it be.
In "The Funeral", Jessi got fed up with living with Shannon at her apartment and moved in with Greg at his apartment instead, where she met Kaitlyn for the first time. Jessi still didn't like Kaitlyn but decided to keep her opinions to herself, seeing as how nice Katlyn was to her and how happy Greg was with her.
Greg is a Caucasian adult male with an elongated face, brunette hair, dark green eyes, and a poorly shaven face. His usual outfit is a red hoodie jacket, a gray t-shirt, blue pants, and brown shoes. His work uniform is a light blue work shirt with a name tag that reads "GRAG", tan khakis, and brown work shoes.
Greg is a pot-headed stoner, whose interests include getting high on weed and edibles, listen to trippy music from Phish and Rusted Root, and riding his recumbent bicycle. He is also the father of a 13-year-old girl named Jessi, and husband to Shannon who constantly nags him for being a he serves as a dull-witted, zoned-out oaf of a father and husband, as he's usually laying around the house and smoking, without actually doing anything to help his family. Greg is a very unintelligent man, as epitomized in "The ASSes", when he thought that they had a female president because of the fictional character, Claire Hale from House of Cards. Because of his stupidity and incompetence, Greg is completely submissive to his wife, who has complete and total control over him. Greg and Shannon often fought and argued in the first season, which mostly ended with Shannon belittling Greg so much that he admits defeat with an exasperated "Okay, Shannon." These fights became more and more prominent until "I Survived Jessi's Bat Mitzvah", when Shannon admitted that she doesn't love him anymore, leading to their divorce, which really hurt Greg. After being dumped, Greg decided that the only way to dull his pain was to get stoned out of his mind. Despite being a bit of an incompetent buffoon, Greg has demonstrated many times to care very deeply for Jessi and want nothing but the best for her. In "Guy Town", Greg knew that the disgusting and rundown apartment complex of Guy Town was a horrible living environment for Jessi to come and visit him in and demanded Guy to remove him from his lease so he could live somewhere more suitable to Jessi. In "Super Mouth", Greg demonstrated a fair-to-middling performance as Jessi's father, where he made his new apartment as suitable to her as he possibly could but also forgot her birthday. After forgetting his birthday, Greg wrote her birthday down so he could ensure that he'd never forget. Overall, Greg is a less-than-desirable dimwit, but a very nice guy at heart, who's trying his best to give his daughter a happy and healthy life, which is especially difficult, given his current state of being a divorced man living on his own in a crappy old apartment.
- Kaitlyn -
- Sleepover: A Harrowing Ordeal of Emotional Brutality
- Pillow Talk (Mentioned)
- The Head Push (Cameo)
- I Survived Jessi's Bat Mitzvah
- The Pornscape
- Am I Normal? (Mentioned)
- The Shame Wizard
- Steve the Virgin
- Drug Buddies
- Guy Town
- Dark Side of the Boob (Mentioned; Silhouette)
- Girls Are Angry Too (Non-Speaking Cameo)
- How To Have An Orgasm (Non-Speaking Cameo; Imagination)
- The ASSes
- Super Mouth
- The Funeral