"Everybody Bleeds" is the second episode of the first season of Big Mouth. It is the second episode of the series overall. It premiered on September 29, 2017. It was written by Kelly Galuska and directed by Bryan Francis.
On a class field trip to The Statue of Liberty, Nick announces that he and Jessi are officially a couple. Meanwhile, Jessi gets her first period.
The episode starts with Jessi trying to find clothes to wear for the day. Shannon comes in and suggests that she wears white shorts, to which she agrees. On their way to school, Andrew asks Nick about his new relationship with Jessi, to which Nick is very unsure of. Maury then tells Andrew to tell Nick to send Jessi a dick pic, but Andrew ignores him.
At school, the kids are getting ready for a field trip to the Statue of Liberty. Matthew greets interracial power couple, Devin and DeVon and tells them their miscegenation is really no big deal. Nick comes in and Matthew says that he needs to pass a final verdict on his equivocal relationship with Jessi. Matthew's snide denunciations pressure Nick into validating his relationship with Jessi, who gets an empty compliment from Devin on her white shorts. After an awkward greeting between Nick and Andrew, DeVon finally breaks the ice and after a thick tension broken only by a loud-mouthed ladybug, Nick and Jessi say they’re now a “couple”. Because of this, they're finally allowed to sit in the back of the bus. Jessi and Nick Rosa Park it with Devin and DeVon and paraplegic Lars, while Andrew ponders on where to plant his own posterior. Maury tells Andrew that he definitely should not sit with the angry nutcase Jay or the retarded anti-social special ed kid, Caleb and then encourages him to sit with Missy but after what went down at the dance the other day, Andrew really can't muster the courage to face her. After spending so long, muttering about, all of the other seats get taken and Andrew gets stuck with the old lady and has to pop a squat by Coach Steve. Maury gets so mad he fucks a duck. On the bus ride, Coach Steve pesters Andrew with stories about how he's dating The Statue of Liberty and Mr. Lizer comments on how America was stolen from the Native Americans. The girls, especially Lola, all find Mr. Lizer to be exceptionally dreamy and swoon over his every word. Coach Steve counters this true fact with nonsense about how this land was given to them as a Thanksgiving present and that the Natives can't be Indian givers. The bus driver's son offers the couples and cripples in the back with romantic drinks but Nick and Jessi turn it down, not feeling as though they have to.
When they do get to the Statue, the couples all disperse among their genders. Nick and DeVon race to the top of lady liberty against Jessi and Devin. Andrew feels sad that Nick left him to hang out with his couple pals. The couples talk about each other. Devin tells Jessi that Nick needs to know what her birthday is. Meanwhile, DeVon tells Nick that he needs to make several compromises with his girlfriend, just like he does with Devin. Nick notices that DeVon is suffering a psychologically abusive relationship with a domineering girlfriend. He even reveals that his name is pronounced "Deh-Vawn" and that he changed it to "Deh-Vin" just because Devin forced him to conform to a homonymic naming scheme. Jay prepares to preform a magic trick to make the statue of liberty disappear. However, he gets captured by security guards, who have their suspicions of him for being a Middle Eastern. With nobody else to go with, Andrew catches up with Jessi and notices a crimson splatter on her seat. Jessi gasps in terror, noticing that today marks the day in history, where she just had her first period. Caleb comes up to say that he sat in strawberry ice cream so that they look the same. Coach Steve converses with the autist to say that he too has hilariously sat in ice cream just for fun. Jessi bolts to the bathroom and tries to wash her menstrual blood away with toilet paper but sadly, a misogynistic Russian janitor has stolen all the toilet paper and thrown them away, being salty over getting dumped by a Russian thot named Svetlana. Jessi begs Andrew to enter the bathroom and Andrew is disappointed to draw similarities between that an the men's bathroom. Upon hearing about this being Jessi's time of the month, Andrew vomits all over the floor.
When Nick summits the statue, he looks around for an absent Jessi and when he asks Missy for help, she blusters him with a geyser of pointless fun facts about the statue of liberty. Coach Steve and Mr. Lizer sit in the crown of the statue of liberty and Mr. Lizer corrects him when he says that the statue of liberty was built on American soil, letting him know that this monument was actually given to them by the French and scoffs at Coach Steve's succumbance to classic patriarchal brainwashing. Coach Steve says that he was never taught that at The Bronx's very own, Fordham University but Mr. Lizer wisely disbelieves he even attended such a prestigious college and wears him down through several layers of lies, from Apex Tech to The Learning Annex to the internet, before Coach Steve finally hangs his head in defeat and admits to his embarrassing illiteracy, which comes as no shock to Mr. Lizer. The Devins take a selfie, which is corrupted by Nick asking where Jessi is. Neither of them know but thankfully, Caleb comes in to tell Nick about her water closet whereabouts, along with a list of several other people he saw go into the bathroom. Coach Steve is delighted to hear that Sasha made this list.
- Jay Bilzerian
- Coach Steve
- Mr. Lizer
- Ghost of Duke Ellington
- Freddie Mercury
- Antonin Scalia
- Singing Tampon
- This episode marks the debut of Connie, Lars, Caleb, Terry Lizer, Shannon Glaser, and The Ladybug.
- Nick and Jessi officially become a couple.
- Coach Steve says that his mom is dating her hospice nurse, who goes by the name "Roberto".
- Couples sit in the back of the schoolbus.
- Lars reveals that he used to be able to walk, before he was vaccinated.
- Jessi gets her first period.
- It is revealed that male "Devin's" real name is actually "DeVon", but he goes by "Devin" so he and the his girlfriend, Devin match.
- List of people who went into the bathroom:
- Andrew is a Mets fan.
- Coach Steve is illiterate.
- Duke Ellington retells the story of the time he scared a cat.
- Jessi first gets her hormone monster, Connie in this episode, officially starting puberty.
- Terry Lizer educated Coach Steve and the kids on how the "Americans" stole the land from the Native Americans.
- Jay Bilzerian plans on making The Statue of Liberty disappear like David Copperfield.
- It's mentioned that The Statue of Liberty is technically not an American landmark, as it was built by the French and given to America as a gift.
- The Statue of Liberty references to the famous cartoon characters, Mickey Mouse and Baba Looey.
- One of the cops calls Jay "Aladdin Bin Laden", in reference to the two famous Muslims, Aladdin from the famous Disney movie of the same name, and Osama Bin Laden the Islamic extremist who caused 9/11.
- Andrew said "Are you there, Jessi? It's me, Andrew." This is a reference to the book, "Are You There, God? It's Me, Margaret".
- Matthew sees a full-grown man wearing a Minions T-shirt.
- The song "Everybody Bleeds" is a parody on the R.E.M. song, "Everybody Hurts".
- Nick and Jessi's relationship as well as Andrew and Missy's relationship from "Ejaculation" is continued.
- Connie tells Jessi that during their time together, she's going to rob a lipstick store. This prophecy would later come true in "The Shame Wizard" when Jessi stole a tube of lipstick from a convenience store.
- On a stall in the girls' bathroom, a heart was carved into the wall along with the writing "Svetlana + Dimitri 4 Ever". Shortly afterward, a Russian janitor, (presumably Dimitri), is shown cussing own his ex-girlfriend, who is named "Svetlana" for leaving him. It's possible that this "Svetlana" is the same Svetlana who later appears in "The Pornscape", with them both being Russian girls named Svetlana. Svetlana works as a livecame thot, which would make it perfectly in character for her to "leave" Dimitri like this.
- Duke Ellington tells the story of how he impregnated a girl, left town, and changed his name to "Duke" to avoid fathering the child and being found. In the episode "Duke", we see a young Duke Ellington (who at the time, went by "Edward") have sex with a girl on vacation in Atlantic City, go back home to Washington, and around the same time, change his name to "Duke".
- Shannon says Jessi isn't ready for tampons, yet enough she has a few on the bed.